1) Customer: Do you serve crabs（螃蟹） here?

    Waiter:   We serve anyone, sit right down.

    （serve:  a.招待；b. 提供，供應(yīng)）

    2) A: What would happen if an eye doctor came into the classroom? 

    B: He'd check the pupils.

    （pupil: a. 瞳孔； b. 小學(xué)生）

    3) Passenger: Is this my train?

    Conductor: No, sir. It belongs to the railway company.

    Passenger: Don't be funny. Can I take this train to New York?

    Conductor: No, sir, it's much too heavy.

    （take: a. 搭乘； b. 拿走）

    4) Mother:  Your hair needs cutting badly.

    Daughter: I think it needs cutting nicely, it was cut badly last time.

    （badly: a. 非常； b. 壞）

    5) Customer: Waiter, I'm in a hurry. Will the girdle cakes(烙餅) be long?

    Waiter:   No, sir, round.

    （long:  a. 長時間； b. 長的）

    6) A: What's the matter with your thumb (大拇指)?

    B: I hit the wrong nail.

    （nail: a. 指甲； b. 釘子）

    7) A: I have a job in a watch factory.

    B: What do you do?

    A: Just stand around and make faces.

    （make face: a. 制造表盤；b. 作鬼臉）

    8) A: I think your son is spoiled.

    B: I completely disagree with you.

    A: Well, come out and see what a steam roller just did to him.

    （spoil: a. 傷害； b. 寵壞）

    9) Dinner: Waiter, this soup is spoiled.

    Waiter: Who told you.

    Dinner: A little sallow.

    （swallow: a. 吞咽； b. 小燕子）

    10) A: What has eighteen legs and catches flies?

    B: A baseball team.

    （fly: a. 蒼蠅； b. 棒球中的飛球）

    11) Teacher: What makes the Tower of Pisa lean?

    Student: Because it never sits down to eat.

    （lean:  a. 傾斜； b. 瘦弱）

    12) A: Which runs faster, heat or cold?

    B: Heat runs faster, because you can easily catch cold.

    （cold:  a. 冷；b. 與catch一起表示“感冒”）

    13) A: What trees does fire have no effect on?

    B: Ashes.

    （ashes: a. 白蠟樹，桉樹； b. 灰燼 ）

    14) A: Why doesn’t a carpenter(木匠) believe there is a stone?

    B: Because they never saw one.

    （saw:  a. 看見； b. 鋸）

    15) A: Why is a restless man in bed like a lawyer?

    B: Because he lies on one side, then turns around and lies on the other.

    （lie:  a. 躺著； b. 撒謊）

    16) A: Why are tall men lazy?

    B: Because they lie long.

    （lie long:  a. 長時間睡； b. 躺下時顯得長）

    17) Jugde: Tell me why you parked there.

    Driver: Because, Your Honor, it said “Fine for Parking”

    （fine:  a. 好的； b. 罰款）

    18) Teacher: Tommy, you missed school yesterday, didn't you?

    Tommy: Not a bit, teacher!

    （miss:  a. 想念； b. 錯過，缺課）

    19) A: My uncle kissed me.

    B: How nice! Did you kiss him back, dear?

    A: Of course not. I kissed his face.

    （back:  a. 回復(fù)； b. 后背）

    20) A: Tom, you know you can't sleep in class.

    B: I know, sir. But maybe I could, if you were a little quieter.

    （can’t:  a. 不許；b. 沒法，不能）

    21) A: Why did the man put wheels on his rocking chair? 

    B: Because he wanted to rock and roll. 

    （to rock and roll是跳搖滾舞。但在這兒，搖rock 的是rocking chair，滾 roll的是 wheels。這就造成了一句雙關(guān)的趣味。）

    22) A: At what time of day was Adam born? 

    B: Just before Eve. 

    （Eve:  a. 晚間； b. 夏娃） 

    23) A: How many feet are in a yard? 

    B: It depends on how many people are standing in it.

    （feet:  a. 英尺； b. 腳）

    24) A: What kind of man can raise things without lifting them?

    B: A farmer. He can raise pigs, chickens and so on without lifting them.

    （raise:  a. 提高，使升高； b. 喂養(yǎng)）

    25) A: What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle? 

    B: The ground. 

    （hard:  a. 難的； b. 硬的）

    26) A: What's the hardest thing about learning skating?

    B: The ice.

    （hard:  a. 難的； b. 硬的）

    27) A: Why do some old people never use glasses?

    B: They must like bottles very much.

    （glasses:  a. 眼鏡； b. 玻璃杯）

    28) A: Why is it useless to send a letter to Washington?

    B: Because he's dead.

    （Washington:  a. 人名； b. 地名）

    29) A: Why is an empty matchbox the best thing to have in the world？

    B: Because it is matchless.

    （matchless:  a. 沒有火柴的；b. 舉世無雙的）

    30) A: Why did Little Tom put his brother's guitar in the refrigerator？

    B: Because he enjoyed cool music.

    （cool:  a. 酷的； b. 冷） 

    31) A: What stays hot even if put in a fridge？

    B: Pepper.

    （hot:  a. 辣的； b. 熱的） 

    32) A: What month do soldiers hate? 

    B: March 

    （March:  a. 三月； b. 行軍）

    33) A: Why is an empty purse always the same? 

    B: Because there is no change in it.

    （change:  a. 零錢； b. 變化） 

    34) A: What book has the most stirring chapters?

    B: A cook book. 

    （stirring:  a. 動人的； b. 攪拌的） 

    35) A: What kind of water should people drink in order to be healthy?

    B: Drink well water. 

    （well:  a. 井水； b. 健康的）

    36) A: How do we know the ocean is friendly? 

    B: It waves. 

    （wave:  a. 起波浪； b. 招手致意） 

    37) A: Why is the library the highest building? 

    B: It has the most stories.

    （story:  a. 故事； b. 樓層）

    38) A: What do lawyers do when they die？

    B: Lie still.

    （lie still:  a. 靜靜地躺著； b. 仍然撒謊） 

    39) A: What’s the difference between the North Pole and the South Pole? 

    B: The whole world.

    （difference:  a. 不同； b. 差距）

    40) A: What is the difference between the rising and setting sun? 

    B: A day.

    （difference:  a. 不同； b. 差距）